Rubber Duckies

<---- My readership has spoken. All ... eight of you. Er, seven of you (my vote shouldn't count). Weight loss won the poll. So rest assured there will be plenty of posts on that. But two out of seven blog visitors, or 29%, want to see a post on rubber duckies (RDs). And by golly, I'm gonna give it to them. The RDs' origins are shrouded in mystery. RDs presumably emerged in the early 1800's, with the advent of rubber toy manufacturing. "The first patent related to a floating RD was filed in 1886," says eHow. These first models made no squeaky sounds. An advance of that technological superiority would come later, after WWII, when they decided to poke a hole in the bottom. This lets out air. Really, it's a RD fart, but we recognize it as the trademark squeak.

By the mid 1950's, RDs had gone from crudely shaped hard pieces of rubber to the flexible molds we know and love today. Not content to be merely floating bath toys, RDs evolved into pop culture icons. When it came to reinventing one's look, RDs left Madonna in the dust; showcasing a variety of themes and colors. Not just a pretty face, RDs built an impressive resume too.

The Actor
Jim Henson's popular 1970's show, Sesame Street, cast one lucky duck as Ernie's costar. Ernie and this RD formed a close bond - both on set and off. The muppet famously professed his love in a song, "Rubber Duckie" (didn't see that title coming). The song made the Billboard Hot 100 chart for nine weeks, peaking at No. 16. Singer Little Richard even got his feet wet, literally, with a cover version.

The Athlete
To raise money for charity, RDs often race against other RDs. Louisville's "Ken-Ducky Derby," donates all proceeds to adults with disabilities. A human buys a numbered RD, which is released into a river, lake, or pool of water with hundreds of other ducks. The first one to successfully navigate the course and pass the finish line, wins.

The World Traveler
On January 10, 1992, a Pacific storm afforded the perfect cover for a ship-wide mutiny. 29,000 Friendly Floatees plastic bath toys from a Chinese factory were "washed off ship."... Yea right. They jumped. Two-thirds followed their innate avian instincts and headed south. They washed ashore in Indonesia, Australia, and South America. The rest journeyed to Alaska. An overambitious subset approached the Bering Strait. Their frozen corpses lie in ice around Russia, as a warning to other RDs ....

The Comedian
RDs pose for photos and then caption them with jokes - "all created with young viewers in mind." Business partner, Mike Quest, offers housing to a collection of several hundred ducks in California. Beyond landlord, Mike collaborates with RDs as their publicist and photographer. Their combined efforts work towards the publication of a duck joke photo-book.

There you have it. Thus concludes the unofficial autobiography of RDs.